Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?

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(419): View more from Ohio

I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.

(260): View more from Indiana

Good luck with that.

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(585): View more from New York

I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine

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(586): View more from Michigan

i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(330): View more from Ohio

the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.

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(409): View more from Texas

Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...

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(707): View more from California

I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.

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(281): View more from Texas

I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.

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