i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Randomize
