never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
