he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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