Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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