their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Quick, to the slutcave!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
