Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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