Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
