Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Ladies don't puke and tell
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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