He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
