We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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