I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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