We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize