She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
