quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
