College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize