you win again, gameday.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
