Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
