windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
