She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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