Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
