Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
sarcasm needs its own font
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
