laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize
