Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
