so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
