You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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