Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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