TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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