I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
