I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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