he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
