btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
