he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
