He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send help, water and tortillas.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
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