I must be too annoying 4 u.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
