barbara walters just said penis...
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize