So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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