Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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