I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
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