Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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