I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
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Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
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How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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