Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
