I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
