somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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