Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
