highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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