I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
