This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize