you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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