Pappa wants mamma naked
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Hippo gnu deer
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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